The NHL playoffs are fast approaching, whether or not the Flyers make an attempt to be included. With that comes the annual advertising blitz, evoking the nostalgic memories of playoff triumphs and the painful flashbacks to bitter losses.

This year’s sample is sublime. Mixed with a haunting piano soundtrack, the league’s advertising agency of choice took old footage of classic moments in the Stanley Cup playoffs and asked the question, “What if?”

These are not those commercials, though. Hockey fans have twisted minds, as we are constantly reminded, and the best part of these ads for them is the opportunity to make their own slightly less romantic versions. The only thing missing is a “Leon Stickle offside” version.

What if Patrik Stefan hadn’t been the first overall pick in the 1999 NHL Draft?

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April Fool’s Day is the perfect day to prank people who already suspect to be pranked. If they catch on right away, it’s good for a quick laugh and then forgotten.

If they go along, however, you’re in for a good amount of fun.

Philadelphia loves colorful athletes, especially those who can pull off a quality ruse. Brett Myers prank on Kyle Kendrick a few seasons ago was the stuff of legends, as was the Flyers broadcast team convincing Steve Coates it was mandatory to wear a helmet between the benches during play.

With that in mind, here are some ideas for pranks that Philadelphia sports personalities could use on this holiest of holy days:

Chase Utley: Go on live television and set up your sentences so that it sounds like you’re about to curse, but stop short. Then, when the producers let their guard down, drop a hard F.

Jamie Moyer: Fool around with hitters by throwing low-80s fastballs while they swing and miss impatiently.

Mike Richards: Go to the bar before tonight’s game and order water with a lemon.

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If Gus Johnson isn’t the best thing about March Madness, we don’t know what is.

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Who wants some old ass bottles?

http://philadelphia.craigslist.org/atq/1656787328.html

Before Mark McGwire introduced Andro to professional baseball writers in the year of our Lord 1998, few thought the sport had a drug problem – as far as steroids go. In reality, drugs have been a part of baseball for several decades. Players used to pop “greenies”, and used cocaine, pot, and generally whatever they could get their hands on.

In honor of Ron Washington stunning the baseball world by testing positive for cocaine when no one knew the league drug tested managers, we present the animated classic “Doc Ellis and the LSD-25 No-No”:

Tired of the spam, this person is selling “absolutely nothing”—for $500. Red Forman, however, is selling a foot in the ass—for free.

http://philadelphia.craigslist.org/clt/1650283443.html

Dumbass.